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Oh Jay!
Thursday, February 26 | 11:31 PM

For a good laugh, I would watch my pre-recorded episodes of Tonight Show With Jay Reno.  I truly like the way he pokes fun of real news items and statistics.  Here are some rioting good times...

Today, Obarak Obama says that the reality of becoming President is beginning to set in.  Hey, sounds like the mother-in-law has moved in.

President Obama has made very few changes to the Oval Office itself. He's keeping nearly everything President Bush had in there - same desk, same chair, same pens - well sure, the stuff's like brand new! It's hardly ever used!

This is kind of an awkward time for President Bush - he's too young to retire and yet to old to destroy the moral and economic infrasture of another country.

One of the few companies doing well, rather, during the economic crisis is MacDonalds.  MacDonalds announced an 80%  profit increase due to the recession.  They're actually making money during a recession.  Isn't that amazing?  This makes it the first recession where people lose their house, they lose their savings but by golly!  they're not gona lose their rest.  YEAH.  Times are rough honey, gotta losen the belt.  It don't make any sense. It's the only country when you're poor, you get fatter!

And Citigroup, know who they are?  They just got 45 billion dollars of our tax dollars.   See what they bought themselves? They spent 50 million on a brand new French made private jet for their private executives. It has a bar, private entertainment center, seating for 12.  If there's ever a reason they reopen Guantanamo Bay, this is it!.  You know that's our jet!  We should be taking that!  They should be taking Southwest! 

The economy is so bad that geese cannot afford to fly anymore now that they've collided with an anthrax train.

A 37-year-old flight attendant is suing Jet Blue Airways after a male flight attendant she couldn't get on the plane to get to her next assignment because she wasn't dressed provocatively enough.  Her clothes were not sexy enough!  Isn't that amazing?  A STRAIGHT male flight attendant? What?!  I was shocked!  I was stunned by it.  

And according British journal of psychiatry, marijuana can cause panic attacks - especially when you are almost out of marijuana.

Well, how disgusting is this?  There's no easy way to say this.  Scientists of the New York City College of Technology says that the Gowanus Canal of Brooklyn - the canal is full of gonorrhea.  There is live gonorrhea living in that canal.  How disgusting is that?  At least that's what the guys are telling their wives, "Honey, I must have fallen into the canal."

Here's a shocking statistic.  80% of men with graduate degrees admit to pleasuring themselves.  I didn't know they gave degrees for that?  Did you know?  I guess that's they call them the masters.